How I Have Been the Past Few Days
After spending a few days in doors watching day time TV and feeling sorry for myself I decided that I would at least try to leave the front door, and my mum drove me into the countryside (easy to come by in Somerset) for an afternoon walk. I got really nervous half an hour before leaving the house, on the upside this was a lot better than the two hours before leaving a few weeks ago. I went to the toilet numerous times, had to use breathing exercises and as I walked through front door I got thought I was going to faint. However, as soon as I got in the car this light-headedness went away and was replaced with a feeling of wanting to go to sleep and anxiousness that something bad might happen before I made it home again. Once out in the countryside I felt a lot more relaxed and really enjoyed the walk despite the cold and wind. Once home I felt much better, my anxiety hadn't gone away but some of the tension in my body had gone away and I felt more happy mentally. Over the next three days I went for some more walks and I found by walk three before hand and when walking through the door I didn't feel anxious at all, I did get a sudden wave of panic hit me once in the car but it quickly went away.
I went to see a doctor yesterday who specialises in anxiety. I was nervous when walking there that I might not be able to get myself to go into the building. Once I could see the building I started to use breathing techniques to calm myself and felt very anxious when walking in, I went straight to the toilet and this helped to calm and focus me. I didn't feel completely right but was able to sign in and see the doctor. She did change my medication and I will make a post about this after I have used them for a week or so.
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